I read once an illustration that shared how President Woodrow Wilson had a housekeeper who was always nagging him. Nagging about how she and her husband didn’t have more prestigious positions in life. One day she had approached the President after hearing that the Secretary of Labor had resigned and flat out asked him (the nerve, boldness!!) to appoint her husband. She said something like “my husband is perfect for his vacant position. he is a laboring man, knows what labor is and understands laboring people” (stop laughing).

With that, the President said, I appreciate the recommendation but this is an important position, requiring an influential person. She rebutted with BUT, “if you made him the secretary of labor, he would be an influential person!”

Amateur. LOL. Isn’t it just like people observing on the side lines to make a judgement call on what it takes to be in a position or worse yet thinking they have what it takes to be in a position. Geesh. There are so many people that think that a title will earn you influence. No sweetie. A title doesn’t cut it! A title only gives you a chance, an opportunity to try out what you think you already figured out in your head. It gives people time to make a call for themselves if you should or should not be in that position based on how you are doing!

July 5th I start a Summer Soul series in my church in hopes that we will get people thinking about “emotionally healthy spirituality” because so many people are dying for positions, titles, status but not so many are dying to get healthy so that when they are in those leadership positions they will be able to have and be a positive influence. Good leaders gain an influence that is usually beyond their role, bad leaders, “spiritually immature leaders” usually shrink their influence to less than when they actually had no position!

Get this one thing folks…a title, a position, doesn’t make a leader but a leader can certainly make a position. A title doesn’t cut it so stop trying to brown nose those in positions that can “grant” you leadership and start working on YOURSELF to be as healthy and aware as you can possibly be and trust me GOD WILL OPEN DOORS FOR YOU and when he does you will be ready to be a positive influence in the lives of many!

Love, Peace & Soul!

On my recent vacation I read a few books, those that know me know that that’s just what I do. I read. But I also attempt to apply what I learn into my life. Contrary to why some people accumulate knowledge, I do because I (like Pinky & the Brain) want to take over the world. Moohahhaha!!

Ok well not really take over the world. Just impact everyone around me as much as I can to make a difference in this world even if its only in my part of the world, beautiful South Florida.

Back to what I started…one of the books I finished was Tony Morgan’s Killing Cockroaches, now for a girl that grew up in the projects of the Lower East Side that intrigued me because HELLO I hate roaches! I lived with them growing up those darn night crawlers so why the heck would anyone name their book after something so well dirty and grimmy and …you get the picture.

However, after reading this easy to read book, after laughing through many a page with Morgan’s humor, I have to say its a good book for leaders to read. Especially if you can actually do something to change things in your place of leadership.  It reminds you not to get bogged down with the every day, waste your time details that in the big picture have no impact on where you are ultimately going.

Now it didn’t give me any new earth shattering knowledge but it was a big reminder of the stupid things that I could let get in the way (and have) to what I’m really supposed to be doing. If you want a “deep, theological discourse” this ain’t it. Move on. If you are looking for a quick summer read as a leader, pick it up.

I have to say, I really, really liked his sacrastic humor. Not many people could pull that off, especially in writing but the dude done did it.

Why did I know that would get your attention! In my line of work I get to talk to alot of women (and men!) and have come to realize that in many, many cases what it looks like on the “outside” is certainly what is going on on the “inside”. Marriages are breaking down and when that happens good sex, let alone crazy good sex, goes out the window! Now, I am a firm believer that “believers” can have this kind of sex but historically for various reasons we’ve treated this area of our lives as a back door, never discuss topic…even with our spouses.

Well not in my house but that is another story.  Without getting into a whole lot of hubbaloo, let me just say every couple should read this book. I’ve been contemplating doing a series of well…crazy, good sex at church. I wouldn’t be the first since a host of pastors have already been down that road. Check this out.  But I’m not the Sr. Pastor so I can only suggest series topics.

If the church must be relevant to people isn’t this a relevant topic? What do you say? Come on weigh in on this? Does your church talk about sex? If it has …how has it?

By the way, I recommend ya’ll pick up this book by Dr. Les Parrott. Who knows you might just be coming to church a whole lot happier.

As I wait for my meatloaf to be done and read my July/August 2009 issue of Outreach Magazine, a few thoughts came to mind like…

Its good to reflect on how people in your life left an imprint on you: I think alot of us zoom through life sometimes forgetting what the last experience with a person did to us…intentionally but sometimes more of denial or wishful forgetfulness.

I recently returned from NYC where I met up with people from my college days and it was an experience that left me more lifted than I even imagined. Some of the people were sorority sisters, others were fraternity men who I partied with in college but most were people who had in one way or another touched my life and I hope vice versa. That Saturday in NYC was a moment that mattered for me. It mattered because I remembered how important our experiences are in our DNA; it was important because I connected with people that I was very tight with but for reasons that were not even good ones, stopped connecting with them. Finally it was important because we got to share the great things that life has given us and even the not so great. We grew up, we were happy to see each other and wish each other a better tomorrow and some of us promised to keep the connection going.

That was a moment that mattered because those people had an imprint on my life however brief our connection was in school. I’ve learned something from my connections with them and I can’t make believe that it wasn’t influential in my life. If we are honest, all the people who have crossed our paths left their mark. I guess this weekend for me I realized just how much and I hope that there were some there that felt the same about me.

In a very real way, we should remember that as we interact with people today. Its not about first impressions its about being a positive force in someone’s life. And no, don’t get crazy, you don’t have to make an investment of days, months or years, some people impact you in a few seconds, by their actions or the words that they say or even the spirit that they bring to the atmosphere.

I’m reflective right now because that moment mattered to me. It was supposed to be just a simple reunion, but it turned out to be a time where I looked in people’s faces and remembered how connected we were at one time. I am sure when you look at your life you will find moments that matter like this as well. Sure, they would be in different settings and with different people but the moment would still be the same…no one crosses our path without leaving their imprint on our life…good or bad.

To those of you who know who you are I am so glad we connected, I am so glad we are making an effort to stay connected and I am so glad you were in my life back in the day. A part of you stayed with me and I have no regrets. I am who I am because of the sum total of my experiences and you are too. Love who you have become and let’s continue to make moments that matter.

Paz!

I am writing from my new HP Mini Netbook. I bought it from a friend who got it at a great price from BJ’s and was about to return it. I said “wait!” I will buy it from you.  I had planned on purchasing a red Dell mini notebook in the near future but this was an opportunity I could not pass up. My hope is that I will now be able to write faster from whereever I find myself. I have the mobile broadband package which will give me wi-fi anywhere from Verizon (something she had to get to get this mini so cheap).

 I leave to NYC next week and I am amazed at how quickly my agenda filled up. I am hoping that I get some earring shopping time in Soho. I love that area.

Anyway, I got book chapters to finish and a magazine to put together so I think I have a busy summer ahead of me.

Not only because I’m Puerto Rican (with African, Taino Indian, European/Spaniard blood lines running through my veins) but as a Christian. My philosophy of ministry and theological stance is just to mixed to be put in any one box. This makes it hard sometimes to find a real “fit” anywhere. What has contributed to this is my roots in Hispanic Pentecostalism and my experiences in church plus my boundary expansion of knowledge in historical research of the “church” in America. Trust me I wish I was not a mutt. I wish I could easily say I am this or that. But unfortunately I am a mutt. I don’t like superstar Christianity, I love a contemporary, black-flavor, urban hip to worship, I need sermons that are organized, to the point and don’t make me work to hard to find the “nugget (s)” of truth, I want to see the church understand that its not the building its the people, I want ministry to be about disciple growth believing that everything else will fall into place i.e. church grows when people who call it home spread a buzz of what is happening in their “lives”… living testimonies you can’t argue with. I’m more “go and do” versus “come and see”, I really despise flaky, no substance clique type of Christianese statements, I wish more people would come to church and not check their brains at the door and so on and so forth.Yeah I am a mutt and with all the I wants and I wishes I just mentioned, I still count it a privilege to serve God in the role I have as Executive Pastor. I still am immensely grateful to God for the opportunity to influence people and I know that being a mutt keeps me learning and evaluating something I wish more people in ministry would do.Yeah, I’m Liz Rios and I’m a mutt. 

I was watching the snippet of the movie, The Bucket List today (always a tear jerker no matter how many times I see it) but for the first time I reflected for a few moments on the closing credits song…John Mayer’s “Say What You Need To Say” and it moved me enough to say what I need to say on my blog (lol).

First so many people wait until until its too late and some never get the opportunity to say what they need to say to the people they love. Why is that? Mostly its pride and/or fear. Both of these emotions fail to make an individual vulnerable enough to share their true heartfelt emotions to others. I remember there was a time I was like that. I never wanted the ones I loved to have “power” over me by knowing how much they could hurt me if they knew how much they truly meant to me. My solution for that ridiculous thought was not to “say” anything. I find that many people do this not only with their close family and friends but even with people they work with on a ministry leadership team. While the emotion or value to you may not be as strong as those friends or family members, there is something to say about those we spend the most time with or who we expect to be “close” too as we do ministry.

So what do I need to say?

Swallow that pride already, let go of that fear

. Not easily done but with a commitment to understand yourself (read Emotionally Healthy Church) that will be the beginning of yanking that root issue out. People need to hear that you value them they don’t read our minds. Do you think it makes you smaller when you express the value of others in your life?

Don’t wait till its too late.

When we go through hard times in life we want people to be there for us but how can we expect “presence” when we never cultivated relationships?

I never want to be in a place in my life where I haven’t expressed myself to those I love and those I minister with and honestly, I hope those around me would do the same for me. I hope we all say what we need to say when we need to say it. We can never rewind a moment.

I hope you had an awesome, over-the-top Resurrection Sunday and took some time to reflect on the great sacrifice Jesus endured for YOU and ME.

In light of the fact that we just celebrated Resurrection Sunday and the price Jesus paid (it cost him something to be obedient to his daddy), I want to take the time to remind you, leading lady, that you too shall pay…your progress, your obedience to daddy God will cost you.We all go through situations in life and as a leader you’ll find that is true about 85% of the time or more! 

Alot of us when asked say, “we are going through something” and we say it like bad news but think about it, if you are “going through” that means you “aren’t stuck”. YES! That means you are moving forward. Isa 43:2 says: “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, and through the rivers, they will not overwhelm you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned or scorched, nor will the flame kindle upon you.” God’s Word is clear, you WILL go through things.Sometimes when we are “going through” we want to “give up”. I just heard Smokie Norful’s LIVE CD and there is a song on the CD called Never Give Up. This is the mantra for any Christian. This is about the Christian journey, not necessarily a ministry, program, school, etc. Never Give Up on God. Never Give Up on His Promises. Never Give Up Moving Forward.

Joyce Meyers said “progress has a price; and becoming a person who never gives up will cost you.” Why is this important to remember…well Jesus pushed through his “if you would have this cup pass from me but nevertheless, your will not mine” moment to fulfill his purpose. In like manner, we will never get where we need to be in life without being just as willing to sacrifice and push through whatever stands in our way. Don’t think you are always 100% on fire either.

Sometimes we get weary and sometimes our fire grows faint but the Word tells us that when we wait on God our strength is renewed as the eagle (Isaiah 40:31).  To wait on Him means that we expect Him to do what needs to be done!Are you hungry to see God use you in ways he never has? Do you desire to do more than you’ve ever done for God?Well set in your mind that it’s going to cost you comfort. It’s going to cost you relationships, time, treasure, etc. But also know this…Everything God ever asks you to do, even if it is off-the-charts crazy and difficult, is because He has something great in mind for you. And God’s great will assuredly, always, most certainly be better than my good!

You can count on it. Jesus did and died believing it. And where is He now? At the right hand of the Father. Yes, it cost him as it will us, but the reward is well…PRICELESS!

Probably not the best thing to do on this day, but I am watching Sicko and I have to tell you I am very, very disappointed. As a parent of a child who needs medical care ALOT it is an alarm. I don’t know many people who have seen the movie put I suggest you view it. The health care industry is making profits while people are dying every day for things that could be treated. The United States is 37!!! in the world for health care. The insurance companies were and are making millions and making their CEO’s much money. The industry has paid many politicians to give them a free ride in our world. I’m mad. Just watch it, I’m sure you’ll be mad too.

Joel Osteen was recently on Larry King and had this to say while Jon Meacham had this to say in Newsweek about the End of Christian America.