“We lead from the essence of who we are as a person.” –Lillas Brown (as cited by Kouzes and Posner, 2002, The Leadership Challenge, p. 43)

Having gone to many leadership trainings, seminars, conferences, I feel like sometimes we got it all backwards. I am pursuing my doctorate in education in the field of Organizational Leadership, I say this to say, its been a real education. Not the type where you stand before leaders whose egos are huge and they are living in illusions of grandeur. No, not the type of learning by osmosis from a leader who has spiritually abused so many there is a trail of bodies in their path. Just real inspirational type of stuff.

There is loads of stuff to read on leadership. Like Good to Great , servant leadership, the leadership model of Jesus, the five practices of exemplary leadership and the list can go on and on.

However, as I continue to walk and embrace this call I feel I have to walk with people and create a culture where its ok to be weird, ok to have lots of interests and not sure where God wants you much less what he wants to do with you, I want to lead from within. Everything I have gone through has made me more compassionate, more patient, more able to see the humanity in me [i.e. the screw up I can be most of the time] which enables me to embrace the humanity in my brother or sister. I just want to BE. So much of today’s church is about “going”, “involving”, “promoting”, “title-ling”…you get the picture. Alot of people thinking they are better than others. “If you think you are better than others, when you really aren’t, you are wrong.” (Gal. 6:3, CEV). Nothing is easier than self-deceit. (Demosthenes).

All this to say that I want to be better INSIDE, my heart, my soul. I want to continue to evaluate ME. That may mean I don’t fit in sometimes. That may mean I won’t be liked at times. But hey, so was Jesus. He walked the same journey. So read about leadership, I’m supposed to be an expert at it by the time I get the three letters behind my name Ed.D. BUT I want my walk and talk to proclaim my connectedness to the true essense of leadership before,after and always.. I want L-O-V-E to be the essense of where I lead from not E-d-D. Education is good don’t get me wrong but the person it does not make. You got to work on your inner being before you should ever attempt to lead from within. Not that you’ll be perfect but that you’ll not be in self-deceit. Selah.