As we are about to close the book on 2009, many people including myself go into reflection mode. We think of how we used the past year…did we do what God wanted us to do? Did i do what my doctor wanted me to do? Did I become a better mom, dad, sister, brother, friend? Many times we come up short with the answer.
I know for myself 2009 was the year I DID NOT…
- Finish my book
- Lose 30 pds
These were the two primary goals that I went into 2009 with and well, I failed again. So I ask myself what kept me from achieivng my dream in 2009?
1. The tyranny of the urgent - as a wife, mom, Executive Pastor, nonprofit consultant, founder of a women’s organization with a new digital magazine to publish and caregiver to my special needs child there is always something to keep me from what is most important. I am going to use this week to think how I am going to change that. I have to change because obviously I am not reaching what I believe is also in my destiny–the book that I believe will help many women get a new attitude about all the lemons of their life.
2. Non-belief - perhaps what has also kept me from achieving my dream is my lack of belief in me. Many people think I have super confidence but honestly there are days after I preach or teach that I tell my husband “oh boy I think I sucked” or when I see a lack of presence from people I expect to be at an event be it my church or my women’s organization and I say “why am I doing this again?” because I feel that the absence is a sign of not caring and perhaps even non-interest. With so many great people out there in the world doing some awesome things for others, I do think what does my pebble contribute. However, for many years I have kept going in spite of that because I just think God prefers that I trust Him more than I trust my own flakly feelings.
In 2010, I am starting my year with prayer and fasting to hear from God. This year I won’t approach him with MY list but I will take a pen and paper and listen to Him and MAYBE He will give me HIS list for me!
In 2010, I am going to have to make hard decisions - saying NO to somethings I really LOVE but are not within my destiny cone. If it doesn’t fit, I’ve got’ta quit. That means if I can find a way that what I am doing is in line with what my overall God-given purpose is then I will have to give it up.
In 2010, I have to schedule book writing time in PEN and CIRCLED. No more excuses. Rachelle is going to get something from me so help me God. I have to step out of my comfort zone as she has written and make a decision to finally do what needs to be done if I want someone to actually take a look at my writing. God provided Rachelle to me purely through circumstances only He can orchestrate and I have been a lump on a log not finishing what she’s requested of me. Yeah, yeah, all legitimate excuses in my head but really not really! Nothing will be accomplished unless I get to it so this year I gotta get to it in a big way.
So what about you? What keeps you from achieving your dream and how will 2010 be different?
Now as a new chapter begins in nine days I dare say…
